It’s For You, and Only You
“Hey, can you help me on this?” or “Can I copy your homework?” is all that I hear as long as I’m sitting down at the desk in a classroom. I can say I have good friends, but at the same time, I feel I’d only be useful if I’m smart and can teach them the topics they’re struggling with. After that, boom, no one would be texting me to have a friendly talk. I’ve always hated that it was all I was good for, but then I realised if I weren’t smart either, they wouldn’t have wanted to talk to me at all. As sad as it is, that has been my motivation for the past few years to make sure I study hard and get good grades. However, within my journey of trying to stay on the ground and not drown, I realised that I have learnt so much more than to meet my friends' needs and wants. It was such an unnoticeable difference, but now that I look back on it, I see that it was a big and confident step. I used to only study to be smart enough to be able to help my friends, but I’ve grown a liking for a few of the subjects that I started to enjoy studying, for myself, not for others. One day, someone mentioned math was the next subject, and everyone was sighing and feeling annoyed, except for me. I genuinely felt like I wanted to learn math and do homework. And that’s the time it hit me that I probably started liking the subject from studying so much. At that point, I didn’t care about the others who’d ask for my help or wanted to copy my work; I’d let them do it, but at the same time, I stopped trying to reach them and focused on myself. Let me tell you, I’ve never felt so much better. I’ve been able to research and find out what I wanted to do for my future from my favourite subjects, and even found a better set of friends who support me and we help each other instead of just the one-sided friendship I used to have. I was able to grow more confident in myself and study just for myself, but my new friends have helped me
above and beyond with pulling me out of my comfort zone and making sure I’d never have to walk alone. This made me realise that studying isn’t only for the grades or to be smart enough for your friends to keep you as their “tutor”, but it’s for you. To help you find yourself, find your interests, and even your target for the future. I’ve seen such a difference in myself. Whenever I look at myself in the mirror, I don’t look disappointed and regret anymore, it’s now full of hope and faith in myself. I know a lot of people say that school is useless, but honestly, they just haven't found themselves yet, and I understand how that feels because I was once like that too, but I’ve learnt to accept that we have to attend school, and now I’ve grown to liking it, even if sometimes it has its imperfections and challenges. But hey, that’s what makes you stronger than before, just like how it made me know my worth and my final choices for my future education and career. Maybe school is better for you than you think.
